"Smokey Butt"

From my Stupid Quotes calendar...an actual misprinting of this famous lyric:

"Hark the herald angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King;
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
Gold and sinners reconciled..."

I am currently listening to my friend Christine's new CD that she and her friend Michelle made with their band, and it's uber-awesome! I love the way their voices harmonize. There are two songs on here I love called "Mary" and "Aries". There's a song on here also called "My Consequence" and the opening lyric is "smokey bar..." but they have little blurbs with them talking about the songs in between things, and Christine mentions that an alternate title for this song (as a joke) was "Smokey Butt".

I spent a great deal of my Christmas weekend (with the exception of Christmas Day) with Eric. I actually spent the night at his house, twice. I love his brothers and sisters. His two youngest brothers, Joel and Jordan, practically worship him as their cool older brother who can beat all their favorite videogames. I love watching him interact with them.

I actually slept on his futon bed with him. No, nothing "happened", nor did I intend it to. It was very innocent, and very nice, actually. We just slept, with him cuddled in my arms. He actually pleasantly surprised me by turning over and kissing me goodnight before we both fell unconscious.

I know this sounds stupid, but I actually am motivated to start working out again, because of him. I spent so much time being depressed and doing failed attempts to get in shape in order to attract guys. And it's funny because I know a lot of people who STOPPED working out once they met someone. But it's different for me...it's like I WANT to...well, you know, attract him and stuff and have the ability to turn him on, etc. So it's like I want to work at it, specifically for him.

I'm going to make it a habit of monitoring my progress here, I think. It's silly, but typing it out here, even if no one reads my blog or pays that much attention...I think that will help keep me in check.

It'll be difficult to get in shape, hanging out with him, though - he wants to eat greasy, carby food all the time. Stupid people with their stupid fast metabolisms. =P He's actually a very picky eater. He doesn't like fish. He won't eat cold meats (no deli sandwiches). He won't eat hotdogs or sausages. He doesn't seem to eat many vegetables. Hmmm...I will have to break him in on things. Mwahahaha.

For Christmas, I got:

Socks (hey, that's awesome, I NEED socks, seriously I do)
DVD player
Bed foam cushion
New pillow (LOVE it, I had all these old, flat pillows)
Flashlight
Xenogears (Eric got me this, yay!)
Chocolates (which Eric's brother Jordan ate most of)
Scarf that grandma knitted

That's all I can remember off the top of my head, but there may have been a couple other things.

Oh, and the other day, Eric was driving and was pissed at this person in front of him going slow, so finally he passed them and says "I am SO done being behind you."

I started cracking up at this, because I (of course) instantly imagined that phrase as something hysterical if someone said it immediately after sex. Eric and I kept laughing about it all weekend. It became our inside joke for the holiday.

Dead Fish

I am staring at my Stupid Quotes page-a-day calendar, and apparently there is some restaurant in Cambodia called "Dead Fish". You know, I had some dead fish last night. It was very good. It was sashimi. Which leads me into my next topic...

Holy Mother of God, the Kona Grill's food is amazing! I had a glass of beaujolais (thought I'd try it, since my character in "My Three Angels" drinks a beaujolais at one point), and we started out with potstickers and avocado eggrolls for appetizers. Then I had my yellowtail sashimi, and the main course was this chicken dish with mango sauce and macadamia nut sauce. ::drool:: Dessert was a passion fruit crème brulée. My friend April ordered the brownie dessert, and it was about the size of half a chocolate cake - others had to help her eat it.

Afterwards, we went to a martini bar, and I think I had the gayest drink I've ever had - a "flirtini". It was good though - raspberry stoli and champagne, among other things. April and Melanie apparently were "cuted out" when Eric actually leaned against my shoulder at one point in the booth, when he was getting tired.

And Eric loved his gifts - he gave me a huge hug right after I gave them to him. ^_^

I actually wonder what Jeremy was thinking...he doesn't officially "know" about me yet, but he probably inferred a lot last night. But he was probably more "Woah!" about the fact that Eric and I were being so friendly to one another. (Jeremy was our Horatio in "Hamlet", and Eric was Laertes, so...)

Anyway, the Kurzes invited me (and Eric and others) to their New Years Eve party. That should be fun.

Work is going better, but it's still crazy-busy. I'm here late tonight, trying to finish up a few things. (So, what am I doing spending time on my blog??)

I didn't realize that my friend Glo (who, by the way, paid for our dinner, since she does ads for the restaurant on the radio - it pays to know local celebs) was going to be in the play "The Seagull" with us this spring. That'll be great. I've been wanting to do another show with her. She suggested we all have a get together for a reading of a play or movie night or something sometime over the holiday season.

Anyhoo, I better get to my ACATS and my Non-ACATS and my CITS and my MFTS and...you know, for anyone who reads this, I hope that you never discover what these acronyms mean. If you do, I feel your pain.

Merry Dinner

Well, at least I got SOME stuff accomplished today at work. My Backlog is all cleared up...FINALLY. But old ghosts are haunting me again, on cases that won't ever go away because the rep is a jackass. Ah well.

Tonight, we all go to Christmas dinner at the Kona Grill. Yippee! I hope that Eric likes his Christmas presents I got him. ^_^ I spent almost TWO HOURS looking at various places, and finally I went to Barnes & Noble, and I found the DVD of "Velvet Goldmine", as well as a copy of the book "Neverwhere".

I'm in a "Chess" mood today. Been listening to the soundtrack at work...

"I don't know why I can't of think of anything
I would rather do
Than be wasting my time
On mountains with you."

On the crazies, out to lunch

Huzzah! "Should of bean a rera..."

These are the mysterious words sent back to me from our clearing firm on a request I sent to them. I have yet to decide what these words mean. So my friend Carrie-Beth and I just use the word "rera" for everything now. For instance, the other day, it was so freezing, I text messaged her and said that it was "Colder than a witch's rera." Today, she told me that she believes in love at first rera, and that she doesn't think I'm reratarded for emotionally attaching to Eric so quickly.

Work is crazy. There is too much work at work. You know, I just realized that work backwards is "krow". I don't know WHAT that portends, but I'm sure it's something interesting.

If anyone has not yet, read a very amusing series of books called "Would You Rather?" There's a question in there about France changing its name to Funkytown, which I would love. Seriously, I think all my mysteries in life would be solved.

Random lyric-age:

"It's no secret that the stars are falling from the sky
The universe exploded 'cause of one man's lie
Look, I gotta go, yeah I'm running outta change
There's a lot of things, if I could, I'd rearrange"

It's a U2 song. I was listening to it earlier. It was one of the songs that inspired my originals script, "Acrobat". You know, it's funny, Eric actually came to the reading of "Acrobat", and that was sort of how we started talking more. I knew him from being in "Hamlet" with him (he was Laertes), but on a whim I invited him to the reading and he did an excellent job with the character of Douglas. And from what I saw of his response, well...that was sort of how I started piecing together that he was gay. Anyway, we started hanging out more after that, and things just...clicked, I guess.

I'm staring at a picture of the One Ring. It's on my page-a-day calendar.

Why did I bother typing that?

Question of the day: If you were a hotdog, would you eat yourself?

Eric would not. He has a problem with hotdogs. And sausage links, apparently. I don't know what the psychological details of this are. But it amused me.

I, on the other hand, love hot dogs. And sausages. And I love to say "sausages" with a Cockney accent.

Eric loves bananas, though.

Okay, maybe that's enough with the stream-of-consciousness. I'm going to try and look for a Christmas present for Eric. He and I and a bunch of our friends are having a holiday dinner at this newer place in Omaha tomorrow night, the Kona Grill. I've been wanting to go there. They have sushi... ::drool::

Rera, for now!

Hello, out there

Greetings. This is my first attempt at this blog stuff. All my friends seem to have or have had one, so...

I don't have much time to type now, so I must be brief. I just wanted to get some thoughts out.

I've just been dancing on clouds these past couple weeks. It's this guy I met in the plays I've been doing at Brigit St. Brigit. Funny thing is, his name's also Eric. There's so much I could talk about regarding all the time I've spent with him lately. But I shall name one in particular.

This past Saturday, I was at his house till 3:30 AM. We were just sitting around mostly. He was showing me his photo albums, and I showed him some things on the website and forums a lot of my online friends post on, and we were laughing and having a good time.

And then things turned pretty serious, but in a really a good way. We had kind of been very cuddly, etc., and talking about things, and at one moment, I leaned in to kiss him...he responded - at first - but then he broke away and instead hugged me tightly, and he said, "I'm sorry. I can't. Not yet."

I just...heard the tone in his voice, and I just understood. What proceeded, though, was even more amazing. We just sat there for...I don't even KNOW how long...and just talked. I told him things about my friend, Nicole's, suicide that I haven't told anyone else...and he just...opened up to me. I could have sat there all night, even if we said nothing else.